3-minute speeches offering deep insights in a short time! Learn life wisdom and grow through diverse themes like regret, happiness, communication, and living a meaningful life.

The Person Pursuing True Value

When salary negotiation season approaches, disagreements inevitably arise. The gap between those seeking pay and those offering it rarely closes easily. It can feel disheartening, as if compensation has become the sole measure of one’s worth, sometimes even leaving a sense of emptiness. Receiving less pay can make you feel your value is diminished, causing hurt feelings. You may tell yourself, ‘That’s not all there is,’ but ultimately, no one is completely free from the issue of compensation.
Andrew Carnegie, once called the Steel King, reportedly administered a very unique test to employees seeking management promotions. First, he observed how much work they could handle without pay. Next, he assessed how clearly their minds were focused on a specific goal and whether they were properly prepared to achieve it. He wasn’t just looking at ability or performance; he was seeing where they placed their ‘value’.
Thinking back, during our college years, we willingly paid to attend classes to learn, and we actively sought out even unpaid internship positions. As new employees, we were grateful to companies that not only paid us but also ‘taught us the ropes.’ Recalling those times, there are days now when I wonder if I’m not living up to my salary. Back then, pure passion and gratitude permeated every day, and I can’t deny that this was a major driving force for me. But now, I feel a sense of regret, as if I’ve somehow let that passion slip away.
If life flowed only according to my will, perhaps it would be truly dull and uneventful, and achieving goals or ideals would be difficult. Sometimes unexpected trials and setbacks strengthen us, becoming the compass that realigns our direction. The crucial question is: ‘What do you value in life?’ Is it money, personal growth, or the process of learning itself? Only with a clear sense of purpose can one move forward without wavering.
The power that goals provide is astonishing. It’s the source that lets us rise again no matter the hardship. If we measure our worth solely by salary or compensation, that amount becomes our entire identity. But if we hold a dream and vision greater and clearer than that, a person’s value becomes impossible to measure by numbers alone. Moreover, someone who walks steadily toward that dream will ultimately grow into a person pursuing true ‘authentic value’.
I too wish to be such a person. Someone who advances with unwavering goals and pure passion, looking further ahead than momentary rewards. Someone who proves their worth through conviction, not numbers. I hope to stand on that path today as well.

Praise makes even whales dance

At work, a boss acknowledging an employee; at school, a teacher recognizing a student; at home, parents affirming their child. This ‘recognition’ might be synonymous with ‘praise’. We often engage in actions like striking up conversations, reaching out, or occasionally offering kindness. Isn’t the underlying foundation of all these actions the ‘desire to be acknowledged’? It’s the desire to hear warm words like “You’re working hard,” “That’s truly wonderful,” or “Thank you.” Everyone wants to be recognized that their work, their very existence, has value.
Just as the saying goes, ‘Praise makes even a whale dance,’ sincere recognition and praise hold far more power than we imagine. A single word of praise can change a life. Ballet dancer Kang Soo-jin was initially clumsy and lagging behind in ballet. But one day, when her teacher told her, “Each of your movements is like a poem,” she gained boundless courage and confidence, eventually becoming a world-renowned ballerina. Like this, praise holds meaning beyond mere words. It is an act of respecting the other person’s existence, believing in their potential, and discovering the value within them.
Recently, a TV commercial by Hana Bank has been touching hearts with its warm portrayal of this ‘value of recognition’. The ad conveys a message of small, simple praise and encouragement for our neighbors through scenes like a young girl letting her little sister rest her head on her arm for a nap, and the story of a woman from Southeast Asia building a life and family in Korea. Along with the slogan “Let’s create a better world.” It shows how much warmer the world could become if we could all tell each other, “You’re doing well,” or “You’re living well.”
Of course, even pleasant words can lose their sincerity if repeated too often. But praise and recognition that come from the heart always move people, no matter when they’re heard. Even a simple, clear phrase, if it comes from the heart, leaves a lasting resonance. That’s why we must make the effort to look at others sincerely and discover their unique value. They say people with a habit of criticism look for flaws first when they see someone. Conversely, those with a habit of praise see strengths first. Ultimately, how we view the world shapes the world around us.
Praise isn’t a difficult skill. It simply requires attention and a warm heart. Even just once a day, offer someone words of recognition and encouragement. That small remark could become a beacon illuminating someone’s life. The habit of giving praise—now is the time for all of us to consciously cultivate it.

It requires a heart that expresses

There was an employee at a certain company. He was diligent and sincere, and had a good reputation among his colleagues. He always handled his tasks with precision and responsibility, and his work ethic was truly admirable. Later, I heard that during his school days, he had managed to cover his own tuition—which was said to be burdensome—and even earned his own spending money. I felt both astonished and deeply impressed. Thoughts like, ‘His parents must have raised him exceptionally well,’ and ‘How wonderful it would be if my own child grew up like that,’ came naturally to mind.
One day, that employee came to work as usual, but his face was as pale as a sheet of paper. He seemed unwell, so I told him to go home and rest, but he insisted he was fine and stayed at his post. He silently handled his tasks, skipping lunch, and completed his entire day’s schedule precisely by quitting time. The surrounding employees marveled at his mental fortitude and diligence, giving him a thumbs-up, and I felt the same way. Outwardly, it seemed like truly remarkable responsibility, but deep down, a vague sense of regret washed over me. Humanly speaking, it was also true that I felt a certain bitterness.
If you say you’re struggling, ways to help emerge; if you admit you’re sick, the right treatment comes. Yet he pretended to be fine while struggling, and acted perfectly healthy while sick. By hiding and enduring like that, eventually even those who could help him end up leaving his side. I truly wished he would realize that clumsy pride or excessive resilience only makes one more lonely and exhausted, offering no help whatsoever. I held my tongue, cautious that speaking up might cause hurt, but regret still lingered in my heart.
It’s probably a habit ingrained since childhood. The belief that you must solve things yourself without speaking up might be too deeply rooted. But once habits harden, they’re difficult to change even as an adult. As this continues, emotions pile up inside, eventually festering into ‘heartache’. That’s why, rather than adopting a defensive posture, we need to practice opening up honestly and confiding in others.
Those who can speak openly and honestly about their circumstances and feelings are truly wise and discerning individuals. If you remain trapped by a fragile sense of pride, enduring pain, sorrow, and suffering alone, swallowing it all inside, life will inevitably grow darker. Remember, opening your heart to someone, asking for help, and occasionally showing vulnerability is never something to be ashamed of. The act of expressing your feelings ultimately saves you and empowers you to extend a warm hand to others.

We must think big

Hello, everyone.
I am truly delighted and honored to be here with so many of you today.
Our nation’s business leaders and public servants are all original and passionate, working with big ideas in their respective fields. ‘Big Thinking’ is not merely an idealistic slogan. As emphasized in self-help books, manuals, and various publications, it is the core element for success and the starting point for creating change. The idea that we should think big instead of small has become common knowledge, and its importance cannot be overstated.
Yet, looking at reality, the situation is somewhat different. Despite the urgent need for big thinking in every organization, whether corporate or governmental, we often remain stuck in small thinking. In practice, many organizations repeat the same processes, tend to mimic other companies’ strategies, or choose only safe paths. This prevents organizations from clearly defining their own vision and direction. If we cannot break free from rigid thinking patterns, we are inevitably destined for mediocre results.
So, what are some examples of organizations that broke free from existing frameworks to realize ‘big thinking’? The ‘Real Beauty Campaign’ by the personal care brand Dove is a prime example. In 2004, Dove attempted a marketing strategy completely different from the existing beauty industry. While most beauty brands featured models with flawless skin and ideal appearances, conveying the message “You need our product to look like this,” Dove prominently displayed the message that ‘beauty is real.’
Ordinary people don’t have flawless skin like magazine models; their body types differ, and they are often older. Yet Dove embraced their natural appearance as ‘real beauty’. This wasn’t merely an emotional message. Dove took it further by conducting surveys instead of ads, posing the question, ‘What is beauty?’ Based on the results, they launched a new campaign featuring models including a remarkable 97-year-old grandmother. It was a bold attempt to completely shatter existing stereotypes about beauty.
Change doesn’t come from following established methods or clinging to safe paths. The attitude of avoiding risks and maintaining the status quo must now be discarded. We need the courage to think boldly, break the mold, and sometimes even ‘make a splash’. This must be accompanied by constant curiosity and interest, and the perseverance to get back up every time a challenge leads to frustration.
What we need right now is precisely that kind of big thinking. It’s time to move beyond small, safe thinking. Whether in an organization or as individuals, we must pioneer new paths from our respective positions. That is the true beginning of change and the first step toward a better future.
Thank you for listening.

We need an attitude that prioritizes considering the other person’s perspective first

Hello, I’m ○○○. Nice to meet you.
How long have you been in the workforce? Compared to middle school, high school, and university days, once you step into society, you encounter truly diverse people. Colleagues, superiors, juniors—these are the people you spend over half your day with. Sometimes, you spend more time with them than with family, making them both comfortable and, at the same time, incredibly challenging.
Not long ago, I met a friend who works in the HR department of a company. Over drinks, she sighed deeply and shared the frustrations of being an HR recruiter. She said the most important factor when hiring someone is their ‘character’. But she also mentioned that properly assessing character during the actual hiring process is incredibly difficult. She explained that you can’t truly know a person’s true nature just from their resume, a few minutes of interview, or a personality test.
My friend mentioned they often have awkward experiences at private gatherings with colleagues from other departments who joined the company around the same time. Complaints like, “What criteria did HR even use to hire these people?” frequently surface. Even those who made it through such fierce competition can sometimes disappoint when you actually work alongside them, or even become sources of conflict.
Hearing this, I was reminded of a truth I feel more acutely as I grow older: ‘The world is filled with truly diverse people, and we must acknowledge and respect that diversity.’ Each person grows up in different environments, and through that process, their own personality, way of thinking, and behavior patterns naturally form. What I consider ‘common sense’ might not be common sense at all to someone else.
In reality, many people I encounter in society don’t operate by my common sense. But that doesn’t mean I should complain or resent it. This is an utterly natural phenomenon and an essential aspect of the society we live in together. So, how can we live in harmony with such diverse people, spending most of our days together?
The answer is simpler than you might think. It lies in the mindset of ‘compromise,’ ‘consideration,‘ and ‘putting yourself in others’ shoes.’ It means first considering the other person’s perspective and adopting an attitude of stepping back a little for the other person, even if it means some inconvenience for yourself. Of course, it’s easier said than done. In our harsh reality, we’re always busy and lack leisure. When will we save enough for a wedding? When can we expect a promotion? How should we prepare for retirement? … It’s already overwhelming just managing our own lives. Moreover, if the belief that “you must outpace others to succeed” is deeply ingrained in this world of endless competition, it can be even harder to cultivate a mindset that prioritizes others.
Yet, despite this, we still need to pause occasionally and reflect on ourselves. What kind of person am I living as right now? Am I making an effort to see things from others’ perspectives? Am I acknowledging people’s differences? Or am I just drifting along, swayed by competitiveness and feelings of inferiority?
Taking a moment to slow down life’s pace and ask these questions—isn’t that the very first step toward growing into better people and better members of society?
Thank you for listening.

The Qualities of Core Talent: What Kind of Talent Are We Evolving Into?

Do you currently have a job? Or do you have a ‘career’?
In recent years, social issues stemming from the imbalance between job openings and job seekers have become increasingly prominent in our society. Universities promote themselves almost like specialized job training academies, and college students, too, invest all their time and energy into studying, driven solely by the goal of securing employment. Working professionals who have entered society also continue studying to survive amid anxieties about early retirement, and even those facing mandatory retirement are challenging themselves with new learning to prepare for the remaining 30 years. Thus, Korean society is trapped in a structure where people relentlessly chase after a ‘job to earn money’.
So, what exactly is the true image of talent this society demands? The talent desired by the current and next generations goes beyond simply ‘people who do their jobs well’. It refers to individuals who possess both professional competence and autonomy—those capable of leading their own lives and contributing to society. How, then, have the standards for talent changed over time? What kind of talent are we evolving into now?
Talent 1.0, central to the past industrial society, primarily emerged among manual laborers. Talent in this era was like ‘machine parts’—people who focused on their assigned tasks and worked diligently. Therefore, a healthy body was the most important condition, and the stamina to sustain diligent labor over long hours was the key competitive advantage. We called these individuals ‘blue-collar workers,’ and among them, the particularly diligent and outstanding were termed ‘Talent 1.0.’
Talent 2.0, which emerged as we transitioned into the economic society, primarily appeared among white-collar workers centered around office and professional roles. They focused on information and data, valuing deep expertise cultivated over long periods in a single role as a key talent virtue. Deep experience and practical skills became their competitive edge, and repetitive training and accumulated know-how to perform the same tasks better were vital assets.
This trend evolved into Talent 3.0 as society transitioned to a knowledge-based economy. Talent in this era focused on leveraging diverse experiences and knowledge for work. The core requirement shifted from merely handling information to possessing the ‘ability to solve problems based on knowledge.’ Individuals equipped with the vast knowledge required for their work and capable of applying it practically were termed ‘gold-collar workers.’ Among them, those possessing creative problem-solving skills and a rich knowledge base were regarded as ‘Talent 3.0’.
However, the talent required by today’s society and the future is Talent 4.0, representing a further evolution. The era of creative wisdom workers, who go beyond knowledge workers and possess both wisdom and creativity, has dawned. They do not remain static with existing knowledge; instead, they fuse and recreate it to generate entirely new value. This is an era where competitiveness lies not merely in knowing a lot, but in how one connects and applies what they know. They are proactive talents who find joy and meaning through their work, connect it to their life’s direction, and respond flexibly to change. We describe them as ‘Rainbow Color’ talents, possessing diverse potential and capabilities, and among them, the particularly outstanding are called ‘Talent 4.0’.
So, what are the characteristics of Talent 4.0?
First, they operate based on trust and belief. They are self-motivated individuals who move forward on their own initiative, placing great importance on trust in their relationships with others. They do not collaborate in untrustworthy relationships and perform at their best in environments where trust can be given and received.
Second, they pursue joy and happiness. For them, work is not merely a means to earn money, but a tool for personal growth and happiness. Therefore, they seek work they can immerse themselves in with enjoyment, taking pride in their efforts. This leads to a sense of life satisfaction beyond mere performance.
Third, they make sharing and contributing a daily practice. They do not stop at being satisfied with their own achievements but possess a desire to share that value with those around them. They possess a global perspective that extends beyond local communities and organizations, taking an interest in practical actions for a better world. Their activities create greater meaning through connection with others.
Ultimately, Talent 4.0 represents the core talent most needed by companies and the leader-type talent who will guide future society. So, what should we do now to grow into such talent?
The starting point is creating a happy version of ourselves. It’s not about living according to others’ standards, but about setting the direction of our own lives and finding satisfaction in it. Within that self-awareness and self-respect, consistent self-development must occur, and we must produce meaningful results in areas where we excel. Only by acquiring expertise, sharing it with others, and expanding it toward a broader world can one truly be called Talent 4.0.
Our society today needs talent with deeper wisdom and broader vision more than just more specialized knowledge. The faster the times change, the more we must focus on the essence, and that essence ultimately lies in the values of ‘people’ and ‘happiness’. I hope you too can become Talent 4.0, living joyfully and meaningfully while simultaneously contributing to the world.
Thank you for listening.

Happiness is not a thought, but a feeling

Hello, everyone. Are you feeling a bit down lately? Everyone carries at least one worry in their lives. When life feels overwhelming, we often look for the cause outside ourselves. Yet, upon reflection, what truly burdens us is often not external, but internal.
All around the world, countless people are angry, hurt, and tormenting themselves by imposing their own standards of judgment. But no matter what they say or do, if I don’t accept it, it doesn’t become my reality. The problem arises the moment I start ‘judging’ something. Judgment creates a binary framework of right and wrong, and that framework immediately influences my state of being. Once that happens, I attract things with energy similar to the ripples of judgment, and I end up creating a life that seems to match it.
People who don’t understand this inner mechanism still look outward without ever looking inward. And they say, “I want to be happy.” Truly, many people dream of happiness and seek it. But the happiness they speak of is mostly based on certain conditions and outcomes. It’s conditional happiness that reacts to external stimuli: someone loving me, my bank balance increasing, good business results this month, my child bringing home an award, or being in good health.
Yet those conditions can change at any moment. So I ask you: Are you happy right now, in this very moment? Even if nothing special has changed, without any external stimulus, can you be happy simply because you exist? This, I believe, is what our souls truly yearn for. Sadly, however, many people focus only on the outward appearance of their ‘self’ and live without ever looking deeply into their inner selves.
Happiness might not be a thought, but rather a ‘feeling’. Yet, we often mistake happiness for a ‘result’ dependent on certain conditions, judging and categorizing it with our minds. So, we keep calculating happiness only in our heads, and if the situation doesn’t match that calculation, we decide we are unhappy. However, if we can become aware of the feelings rising from the depths of our hearts, and if we live fully applying those feelings in our lives, we will no longer be swayed by external conditions and can stand as our true ‘selves’.
Couldn’t we say that is true enlightenment, true happiness, and also true love? I hope you take a moment to quietly ask yourself what the essence of happiness is, and by what standards we are defining happiness right now.
Thank you for listening to the end. May your today, and every moment of your life, be filled with the true meaning of ‘feeling-based happiness’.

The Secret to Eloquence: The Path to Becoming a Skilled Communicator

According to a Samsung Economic Research Institute survey of CEOs on ‘qualities of a good CEO’, the top trait was none other than interpersonal skills. This means that ‘communication skills’ form the foundation. A similar result emerged from the American business magazine 『Fortune』. In a survey of 500 CEOs from Fortune 500 companies, the most important quality cited was ‘humanity’, followed closely by communication skills in second place.
Exceptional communication skills aren’t just for top executives. They’re essential in everyday life and for all of us. For instance, about 30% of job applicants who failed interviews cited “poor communication skills” as the reason. Even candidates who clearly identified the company’s situation and problems, and logically explained why they were indispensable, often stumbled when faced with unexpected questions like, “How do you plan to spend the rest of your day?” or “How do you plan your daily tasks once you start work?” They often become flustered and struggle to continue. While they can confidently deliver memorized answers, they are unfamiliar with natural, comfortable conversation.
This speaking ability plays a crucial role not only in professional life but in all human relationships. Particularly in romantic relationships, ‘people who speak well’ are highly popular. Approximately 40% of unmarried men and women consider the ability to speak with humor a social lubricant and rank it as a talent they would want their children to possess. This highlights how speaking ability is viewed as a significant competitive edge in social life.
However, fewer than 20% of people actually say they are satisfied with their own speaking skills. So, what common traits do people who struggle with speaking well share? They generally struggle to listen to others, are stingy with praise or expressions of gratitude, and find it difficult to reveal their desires or be honest about themselves due to an introverted personality. Particularly, the habit of tediously muttering negative remarks is cited as the biggest flaw in speaking.
Are you suffering in silence because of your speech? If so, it’s best to start by examining your conversation habits with those closest to you. How can you become a better speaker?
Within our long-standing social and cultural context, Koreans have been taught from childhood that silence and reticence are virtues. This culture of reluctance to ask questions is not unrelated. In the past, children who frequently asked questions in class were often seen as disruptive to the lesson’s progress. This passive attitude toward speaking ultimately fostered an atmosphere where the loudest voice prevailed, rather than encouraging logical thinking or proposing reasonable alternatives.
But now, it must change. The core of speaking well lies in ‘consideration’ and ‘confidence’. You don’t necessarily need to be eloquent or have a flamboyant way with words. Instead, it’s far more important to leverage your own unique characteristics. Kim Je-dong, widely recognized as an excellent speaker in broadcasting, charms with his distinctive, slightly disheveled style, while anchor Son Suk-hee earns trust through his sharp logic and analytical skills. The late lawmaker Roh Hoe-chan captivated audiences with his rich metaphors and humor.
Finding your own speaking style is entirely possible. If you’ve ever experienced conversations stalling when you try to speak, people suddenly going quiet, or jokes meant to lighten the mood falling flat, first analyze why. Then, develop a conversational style that highlights your unique strengths.
I, too, can become a master of rhetoric. What matters isn’t innate talent, but finding your own speaking style, practicing it, and refining it. By gradually building confidence and learning to be considerate of others, anyone can become a skilled speaker. Why not start examining your own speaking style right now and take the first step toward change?
Thank you for listening.

Happiness is knowing how to be satisfied

People often say happiness is simply a life of satisfaction. Yet, among you here, and including myself, very few can truly say they live a life of genuine satisfaction. We live feeling a constant sense of lack, as if something is missing. But in truth, if we could be satisfied, then whatever we eat, whatever we wear, whatever we do—that would be a happy life.
Unhappiness, it is said, stems less from actual lack than from the ‘sense of lack’—the feeling of insufficiency. Furthermore, it arises from the relative sense of lack that comes from comparing ourselves to others. Ancient philosophers cited five common human shortcomings as examples. First, wealth that falls slightly short of the level one desires for eating, clothing, and living. Second, looks that are slightly lacking, not quite worthy of universal praise. Third, honor that fails to receive the recognition one takes pride in. Fourth, physical strength sufficient to defeat one opponent but not two. Fifth, eloquence that resonates with only half the audience when speaking. Thus, the condition for happiness is not a state of perfect fulfillment, but one that always remains slightly lacking and imperfect.
Whether it be wealth, appearance, or honor, if one were flawlessly perfect, it would likely invite worry, anxiety, tension, and unhappiness. Hence the saying, “Better to be lacking than to have too much.” It also serves as a warning that relentlessly pursuing desire without knowing satisfaction can ultimately invite disaster. Yet humans are inherently incapable of easy contentment, constantly chasing desires, and not infrequently find themselves on the path to ruin.
Of course, desire itself isn’t inherently bad. Humans mature and grow through the great driving force of change and development. Perhaps the two propositions of ‘satisfaction’ and ‘desire’ are the vital values we must constantly grapple with throughout our lives. However, when that change and development degenerate into greed rather than healthy maturity, life inevitably faces a serious crisis. This is why growth is sufficient when it brings self-satisfaction, and success should be achieved without compromising inner peace.
A life that knows contentment is ultimately one that leaves spacious room within the heart. When we can fill that empty space with a positive mindset at any time, we gain the capacity to embrace more with a generous heart and assess situations with greater ease. Wasn’t the very reason ancient scholars shunned wealth and honor to pursue a self-sufficient life precisely to attain that stability and peace? A life of contentment stems from abandoning vain desires, being grateful for the life given, and living with humility. Therefore, clearly knowing one’s place and striving to live a life befitting that position is an essential condition for a contented life. Reflecting on one’s life moment by moment and re-examining one’s position is a lifelong task we all must practice.
Plato said, “Happiness lies in a life spent filling what is lacking, while remaining moderately wanting.” Yet we often forget this truth. We live fixated only on what is lacking, what we need more of. Happiness comes to those who can find satisfaction while doing what they wish to do. Ultimately, we must not forget that happiness does not stem from material abundance, but from a heart that knows contentment.

Regret is a waste of time

There is a Japanese hospice doctor named Otsu Shuichi. While watching over terminally ill patients in their final moments, and through his experience accompanying over a thousand people in death, he realized one crucial truth. That is, everyone regrets something at the end of their life, and these regrets share a surprising degree of commonality. He compiled this insight into a book and shared it with the world.
The list of regrets he compiled is not vastly different from the vague sense of regret we feel in our daily lives.

“If only I had said ‘thank you’ more often to the people I loved,”
“If only I had done what I truly wanted to do,”
“If only I had been a little more humble,”
“If only I had shown more kindness,”
“If only I hadn’t done bad things,”
“If only I had dreamed and worked to achieve those dreams,” and so on.

These thoughts naturally take root in our hearts as time passes. Perhaps death, life’s final stage, is simply a point we naturally reach as we grow older. That’s likely why the deaths of those who end their lives young feel especially tragic and heartbreaking.
However, this book also introduces regrets of a somewhat different nature. Items like “If only I had gotten married,” “If only I had children,” or “If only I had married off my children” fall into this category. Reading such content prompts the question: ‘Must we make every choice in advance to avoid regrets before dying?’ For instance, even if pushing for a child’s marriage becomes one’s final wish, there’s no guarantee that choice will yield a good outcome. Accepting that marriage is ultimately the couple’s responsibility and letting go of the mental burden parents carry might actually be the better choice. Of course, I myself am not yet facing imminent death, nor am I in the position of having children who have reached what is commonly called ‘marriageable age,’ so I may not have the right to speak. Nevertheless, under the premise that life’s choices cannot be perfect, I find myself reconsidering the very goal of a ‘life without regrets’.
Moreover, regrets like “If only I had planned my estate in advance,” “If only I had thought about the funeral arrangements,” “If only I had clearly stated my final wishes while healthy,” “If only I had seriously considered the meaning of treatment,” or “If only I had known God’s teachings earlier” intersect with the recently discussed topics of “death preparation” and “dignified death.” In reality, these critical decisions should be discussed between the patient and their family. Yet, all too often, a younger, stronger, and more vocal guardian makes all the decisions instead of the patient. This is why having thorough discussions while healthy and clearly stating one’s wishes is not merely an ideal principle but a practical matter of life.
We often regret things that have already happened. But upon reflection, few things waste time more than this. I recall the words of a renowned New York neuropsychiatrist in his retirement speech. He said that through countless encounters with patients, he discovered a ‘teacher’ who had a decisive influence on changing his own way of life. That mentor was none other than the word many patients constantly repeated: “if.”
He says:
Patients spend most of their time looking back at the past, regretting things they should have done but didn’t.

“If only I had prepared more thoroughly before that interview…”
“If only I hadn’t let that person go…”

But these ‘ifs’ only leave endless regret, an emotion that is also mentally draining. So he makes a suggestion. Let’s replace the word ‘if,’ which we use far too often, with ‘next time.’ For example, if you missed a lecture you really should have attended, try saying this:

“Next time the opportunity comes, I will definitely attend that lecture.”

It might feel awkward at first, but as you repeat it often, you’ll find that phrase has become your habit. Don’t hold onto past events in your heart for too long. When feelings of regret suddenly wash over you, try saying this:

“Next time, I won’t make such a foolish mistake.”

These small shifts will help you break free from past regrets and, most importantly, allow you to use your precious time and energy for the present moment and the future ahead. We all make mistakes, but we don’t need to waste too much time dwelling on them. Regret should fuel a better tomorrow, not become a shackle holding you back.